Malaysia Woman Marathon

Recently I feel like I am in love again, with all the connections in life.

Had a bad nightmare last year, you thought you will be defeated when it happened. Cried for a few days and when sometime you think of it again, the tears again come down. What make us still standing upright is the power of love.

Life has trained me to be always feel in love when you have all your friend (whom are mostly still single and well don't need to tell me that they might be no longer single anytime soon) still around.

Countdown to Ten Years

I still remember few years ago, I went to a yamcha session with my secondary classmate, there are only a few of us, talking about we have been leaving the school for 5 years, then we come out with the thought that we should have a reunion to find back all our classmates when we reach the Tenth anniversary. 

And we realized we are reaching the date soon after talked to my friends recently. It is next year end. 

Today, I went out with my friend, recalled about my secondary school life, recalled of the music classes, and get excited when I tell her that how handsome when those talented guys who can play those music instruments. Recalled how envy am I when looking at my friends who are able to play a whole songs. (I only manage to use a single hand at that time, now even dont really recalled about the notes). 

So there is only one thing I can do, stand aside and give a loud applause. That is my position and never thought of I will be the one stand out from people anyway. 

But there do have some changes in my life during that period, we learn about friendship and love, both that have incredibility change my mind and growth. 

I am not sure how many will our lovely class monitor able to call back all of them, we joked and say maybe we should also ask everyone to bring their partner, and if Andrew and Woei Dyi cannot find a partner that time, they will be each others' partner then. (Story back to ten years ago, PhD has totally spoiled the market for ah gong. ) 

Almost everything else has changed compared to ten years ago. What remains the same is I am still used to look at talented and handsome guys, as well as some of the crazy friends who are also become more of like a family than only a friend. 

We are all different, but faith has bring us together, some used to be the listeners, some like to share their experience and knowledge, and don't know when is it started, I become the person who like to call them out whenever I go home, to get updates on their life journey and sharing mine. I don't know how many ten years we can still gather together and talk a lot of nonsense. Laugh at each other and joke. 

For this moment at least, I really appreciate the presence of them for the at least ten years of friendship, each for me are special. They are the lamps for my journey of life. And between these ten years, there are also a lot of people come and go from the life, Never know who will stay the last but yeah, thanks for those who let me dig out from time to time, and also those who dig me out from time to time. 

It must worth a life time to be remembered. 

p/s: What's next? To make sure I can laugh at both the guys when the date come I must find a partner. Target target! 

Bear bear going to move back to my hometown first before I find her a home.

The master going to plan her trip to travel and explore to more opportunities!

Countdown for 22 months to go!

Calculations in Life. 当你计较越多，得到的就越少

One decision that I have made about 10 years ago, did not realize how much it will affect until the time comes.

Sometimes I do think about it again, wonder why I come after Science subjects that I am not confident with for my future but not the one that I really masters. Since young, I am good in calculations, school competition, examinations I am among the top. Worst than that, I am too proud to have this talents, while people is struggling to get an A in Additional Mathematics, I can always have half of the time sleep during the examination and still having an A on hand. 

But why on earth I abandoned my Mathematics and go for Food Technology? 

The initial idea was having no idea, simply due to I dont know about what to take and maybe study about what you eat will be a good idea at least if not using for work, it is good for life. Although end up I am still not sure how the food process make up the food I eat today, I realized there is a good thing I dont continue my Mathematics. 

Being too calculative in life you dont know how many things that you have loss in fact. Not everything cal be count from the numbers, more things comes behind it, there is more meaningful items happened behind the logical mathematics.

Once upon a time, before I entered university, I decided to leave home and go to Genting casino for part time job. Simply because it was the highest pay that I can gain during the time. Sum up the two times experience, it was about 9 months time, I have sufficient money to spend in my university life with addition of PTPTN loans without the need to work part time. I can focus to be a full time student and play as much as I could. 

But what I have lose, I lose the most precious health, among the last part time, I work for almost 6 months, with the midnight shift, with the second hand smokes, without any kind of sports, my body totally turned upside down. 

I almost stuck at there with the amount that I earned and the laziness to continue studies. Luckily manage to step out the comfort zone and leave the place. The experience of working at there definitely is not a loss, I have managed to find and know a few good friends there, most of us have resign and continue study and graduated. 

I thought I will be going back to work part time during the semester break, but due to some issues, it ended up not once I go back. At the end, I chose to help in the shop and gain little pocket money to cover off my expenses at university. But it end up to be the last four years that I am working and helping in the shop, the last moments that I have with my precious daddy. 

May be it is also faith that I chose not to come back to Melaka for work. Once leave, cannot find a place to locate myself back to home. More things that cannot estimate, he left us forever within a year I started to work. 

Funny facts: I found home every time I travel, Genting, Penang, Chiangrai, and now Johor. But not the home after my beloved daddy left us. I never thought so many things happened in the short time. But thanks to that, I am sure and confirm to kick off the start as soon as I can. 

Never underestimate how calculations can kill a life. A helping hand to the poor can save a life. A lot of down times in life, I have supports from daddy, sisters, buddies, friends, colleagues, and many more stranger. They guild me to where I am today, although not rich in pocket, but richer in mind. 

That is what make me feel rich. A wiser mind. Although money is essential to life, what is more valuables is people that you met in life, they are the treasures in life. 

People always wonder why I have so many different people to entertain, my long lost seniors, seniors, juniors, ex colleagues, course-mates, and even lecturers. Simple as an appreciation, they build who I am today, although still the introvert and quiet kids, she managed to start travel and see the world, she managed to gain knowledge from everybody, not from books but more from the life experiences. 

好好说再见

Just a short post to update the blog today for what happen last week.

Last week was a crazy week full with up and down.

Over the weekend I went back to Melaka, mum just undergone an operation to cut her toe on her right feet. She is lack of knowledge about all these and we have to try make her comfort that she can still able to work and live as usual after the operation.

Then my eldest sis come and make all the complains to us about the extra charge of mum on her. She keep on nagging in Wechat until all of us cannot concentrate on work. So end up other sisters asked me also to go back home and settle this issue.

On the Wednesday, woke up super early in the morning. It has become a real dilemma, keep on refreshing while working, wechat keep on vibrating from the other hell, and the sleepiness come as woke up too early.

Then try to solve thing one by one. Sometimes, you will start appreciate everything around only when you started to countdown the day left. Good lesson. Countdown for everyday in your life. Only you know and remember that, we only live once. Appreciate each day.

Not forget to say thank you for each of you that has been accompany, supportive,  advice and also drag me down. All of you make me stronger, more training needed. I am ready to accept the challenge. Haha.

The Banned Movie in Malaysia

I recalled a movie list of mine which I have long forgotten  until I saw in Facebook another movie <Banglasia> which has been banned for more than a year, by Namewee. He was trying to raise fund for his movie to be published online as several ways has been tried to get through the government sector but failed.

So in case of anyone read this blog, well, not much people did I suppose, then if he/she is interested to support then they can do their part to watch the banned movie. 

I am not a fan of him, but the banned movie of <Banglasia> has reminded me of one small little to-do list.

我是演说家观后感之 存在感

昨天，泡在房间里看了〈我是演说家〉，差不多又到了总决赛，每个人的演讲都在不经意之间把我点醒。当然，不是每个人说的话都让我们信服，每个人都有自己对待事情的观点，也用着不同的方式去告诉身边的人，每个人能够接受的方式也不一样。

其中，我印象深刻的是吕强，他没有进前三甲，是个90后，应该是传媒系的。他说了关于“存在感” 这件事。在面子书上，现在的大家都在及时更新状态：去哪里吃大餐、今天过的如何、去哪里旅行、形势观点等等。反观之，上一代人，那时侯没有网络、没有太多科技，两个年过70岁的老人，车洪才一个人完成了一本汉语普什图语字典，另一个屠呦呦发明了疾病的 药物。

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有一段日子，我都有定期的去更新面子书 ，让身在各地的朋友能够知道我的状态。我以为大家和我一样，会去看看其他人过的如何。最后发现，他们都很认真的在过好自己的现实生活，根本没有时间去浏览你到底做了什么。

而我身边有一些朋友，他们不太上面子书，没有什么更新，更不用说他们是否会看到你更新的任何状态。

这些朋友，在网络的虚拟世界里显得很没有存在感，却是我最好的说故事者。他们很认真的阅读、实践，也不吝啬的把所知道的分享给我们。虽然我们这群90后，刚刚从学习知识的象牙塔走出来，或许我们的力量很小很小，小到没有人看的见，但是这些知识，我们互相学习，一起从改变自己，影响身边的人，在五年、十年的时间，他们可能是耀眼的一颗星，在照亮其他人。

也有另一班朋友，很认真的生活工作，养活自己，养活家人，和生活在打拼。这一班的朋友，比较长的时间是在聆听我的唠叨，对生活的不满。很多时候，当我尝试反省的时候，发现他们所需要烦恼的事其实比我多很多。

存在感，我尝试在现实和虚拟世界中寻找平衡，或许一度的太过沉浸于虚拟世界，虽然没办法完全抽离，我希望我还是一点一点的在现实生活中找到属于自己的存在。

备注：由于很长一段时间没有练习华文，造句生字都不灵活了，现在开始，不定时的写写中文，把生锈的刀磨一磨。

2015

November coming to an end finally. Now it left last month for year 2015.

Today is another lazy day, which I am suppose to do some work but end up i just sleep all day long. Feeling physically and emotionally tired after the hectic month, and it is time for a full year review on work. I feel very much to have a quick glance of my 2015. 

The biggest changes in the beginning of the year to now is, I have been running back and forth to Melaka until April, until there is no more a need for the rush. Kind of blaming everyone including myself for the loss. Wanted to treat like nothing has changes so far. But you know that everything has changed especially when you go back home. Thus, it make a significantly drop in frequency travelling home. 

Still managed to back home once a month though until this month, which I have to spend a weekend at Penang and also annual dinner yesterday so I plan to go home only next month. Sometimes it is hard to face the reality when you have been busy for some period then suddenly you have a break off. The wire seems like could not functioning well. 

After last year brought my colleague from China visit Melaka, this year my colleagues have come to Melaka. Three were two days planning with my coursemates, seniors team graduates and also a few of my batch mates. 

with my course-mates waiting for sunset.

With the Thursday night outing colleagues.

with Deb and Jia Yi

Meet back a few of my friends, seniors and juniors at the southern parts of Malaysia. One senior has just got married recently. Not manage to attend though. From Facebook, saw a few of friends have been in another life stage, having a partner, engaged, married, and some with their children. 

My sister also going to be official someone's wife as well next year. Not managed to attend her registration day this year due to some reason. I have spend my leave only in Melaka for the year. 

After graduate, finally I managed to fulfill my promise to find my girlfriend in Batu Pahat, she has been travelling up to Penang to visit me there, but I have never find her in her university until her graduation and been disturbing her a few time on the journey back to Johor from Melaka. Everyone is busy learning in this stage of life though, we have been long time do not have a heart talk and sharing already. When get to find her also she is the one listening to me mumbling and bring me to the good food around. 

Batu Pahat fishball noodle

 

nice latte in the house

Year to date, it has been more than a year of working life, which it has been over the adoption period of working life. But there is too much changes in work, so until now not yet able to adapt the changing environment and also the people come and go. Which I am not sure how will it be next year, with expecting there will be more changes come along. 

Farewell trip with Sang Mei back to her hometown.

Time scroll so fast that even my juniors also have graduated. Due to it is also the same timing as Penang Bridge Marathon, I managed to get back to USM and celebrate with them in person.

DTSP, USM- the hall that each of us enter twice in life time,

first one for orientation.

The second one for graduation.

 

Good memories in Johor, I have a few people love running the marathon. People ask why am I so in love with marathon. I am not able to tell the answer. I once thought to stop it but when never run, I will never move and when the stress level goes up, I find no way out. Thus, I am still not able to run away from the sports to relieve and heal myself emotionally and physically.

In reality, I am not a risk taker, I always only do things that I am confident with. In fact, marathon one of the special case that I have challenge it again and again. It creates a little up and down for the simple life for this girl.